My 4th First Day

Today was my "first" day of work at a company I've worked for three times in the past. Last time was in 2010. It was a good day. I work in the IT department, doing internal technical support and clerical tasks. I feel important and valued there, and my coworkers are friends who believe in me. They give me plenty of opportunities to learn new things. It's great. =) Add to that the fact that I'm getting paid more than I ever have before, and I get to use a company iPad, and I'd say things are pretty swell. Getting laid off from that other company earlier this month was quite a blessing. I'm grateful to be where I am. 

Oh and did I mention the commute is half as long? Yeah. Life's pretty awesome. =)

Discovering Joy

Poetry/lyrics to capture the last few months, since I moved home from USU:

Good food

A safe home

Finding new favorite songs

I'm discovering joy

Having purpose

And vision

Knowing that I have a mission

I'm discovering joy

Freedom from constraints and policy

I can go down the paths that call out to me

Knowing there is a plan

And things I must prepare for

I have such a bright future in store

But I don't have to wait until then

To find my excitement again. 

My true friends

My family

The ones that know a truer me

Help me rediscover joy

The laughter

The connection

The kindness and friendship and quiet protection

I'm discovering joy. 

The Savior

His Gospel 

His Coming in glory

I'm discovering joy

Knowing I'm on His right path for me

Learning He'll help me be all I can be

Through Him being thoroughly healed from all things

Finding the light and the joy in each day

Being guided to know what to say and not say

Feeling excitement and love as I pray,

I'm discovering joy. 

Embracing the the challenges given to me

With my Savior I can do anything. 

As I lose myself I will find me. 

I'm discovering joy. 

Honest Opinion #3: Men's Voices

Given equally talented choirs or ensembles, I would much rather hear men sing than women. Some women's groups are great (The Wailin' Jennys are my favorite) but in almost every case, men are better. Their voices are powerful, heavenly, soothing, invigorating, etc. I just love them. 

Because of how much I love men's voices, it is one of the things I really insist upon in a future husband. I genuinely care more about vocal cords than biceps. 

Men's voices just generally have more power to move me than anything else musically. They're the best. 

"A New Hope"

Several honest opinions today:

Star Wars IV and V should definitely be seen before I, II, and III. 

Peanut butter in chocolate ice cream is a very delicious thing. 

FHE should not involve anyone acting on anger. 

Gandolphos has pretty good sandwiches. 

News of my day: I was happy at work. The 8 hours flew by, which was a nice feeling. 

I left the house during an angry moment in FHE, and was able to calm down and eventually pray for my family. I found peace of my own, and charity, which helped me to not provoke anyone further when I went inside. 

Hoping I can get a lot done at work tomorrow. I hope to finish my journal project soon so I don't feel so bogged down with the past. I'm liking the past less. I like the present and the future more!

Sacrifice

One of the most painful verses in the Old Testament:

And [God] said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.

In order to be refined, we have to be perfectly willing to give up everything we care about the most, in faith that somehow God will still keep His promises, and that either in this life or the next, everything will turn out better than we imagined.

It's one thing to casually acknowledge it, and another thing to go through it.

For me, part of it has been being single when nearly all of my friends are married with children. I've always wanted a loving relationship so much, but I think one of the reasons I am still single is that God needed me to learn to turn to Him for comfort and help with my problems, instead of trying to find another person to make me whole.

I'm happy to say that recently, I've really started to feel whole. I've found comfort in God, and I don't have that desperate lonely feeling anymore (or at least not nearly as often). I know that God has plenty of work for me to do to help me grow and to help me serve others. I feel like I have work to do in the building the kingdom, and I feel no need to worry about the fact that I am single. I trust my Heavenly Father that everything will turn out right, and I'll just simply trust in His timing and focus on the things He's asked me to do at this point in life. It is a fantastic feeling, starting to feel whole.

After I've learned this lesson sufficiently, I'm sure I'll be called upon to sacrifice something else. But with each trial my faith and confidence in Him will grow, and I'll be able to meet every challenge that comes and every sacrifice that is asked of me.

Faith is such a good feeling. =)

Honest Opinion #2: Sushi

Sushi is awesome. Some people worry about raw fish, but I just really don't. I love the taste of the sauces and all the ingredients; the textures of the fish, rice, seaweed, etc.; the large-bite-size of them; the soy sauce and wasabi; the ginger in between. And I think I really love eating things out of the norm, things that I don't have very often. I love the novelty and variety of it. And I love sharing rolls, so that you can keep switching from flavor to flavor. It really is the way to go.

Fortunately for me, some of my favorite people of last year were major sushi fans as well. I had sushi for my birthday with Steffen, I introduced Sarah to sushi for the first time (of many times thereafer), and when I moved away from Logan, Sarah and Steffen and I ate tons of sushi.

Unfortunately, sushi is a little expensive, and not everyone else likes it. But let it be known that I do.

Honest Opinion #1: Immigration

So, back when I dated Jeff, I gained a lot of political opinions. Some I still hold, but not all. I think. Anyway, one of the strongest opinions that stayed, and was later amplified through my own experiences is my opinion on immigration.

I believe that reforms should be made so it is much easier for immigrants to come to the United States to live and work.

I do not believe that crossing the border is a crime in and of itself that deserves the punishment of deportment. I believe that immigrants who commit felonies or serious crimes should be the only ones to be deported.

I do believe that the process to become a citizen should take some effort and time, but not money, and not a ridiculously long amount of time. The right to vote would be granted to those willing to put in the extra effort of becoming a citizen.

I see all these immigrants as people, and believe they should be allowed to seek the opportunity to provide for their families and have a better life than they may have been having in their home countries. And I believe their presence blesses our country, not damages it (with the exception of those who commit serious crimes, and the non-criminals far outnumber the criminals).

I  know I haven't addressed everything about the subject, but these are my current opinions on the matter.

That feels good. =)

Honest Opinions

In the past I have been someone that likes to please others. However, I am now making it a point more than ever to work on my authenticity. I had the thought a few days ago:

Somewhere I want to write down my opinions so I don't change them all when I start dating someone. I need to be honest with myself. So I can then be honest with others. Opinions can change, but only for valid reasons. If I later change opinions, ask myself why I did, honestly.

Then I thought

Hey! I have a blog! And not very many people read it, so its a perfect place to teach myself to be honest with my opinions.

If I go viral, I'm in trouble. But I really don't think that'll happen.

So, I plan to post some short opinions with the label "Honest Opinions" and challenge myself to think about and commit to an opinion enough to say/type it out loud.

My goal is not to persuade, only to express. And mostly for my own sake.

You can comment if you disagree. It'll give me an option to stand strong for my opinion. =)

 

Charity

"Charity...is not easily provoked."

How does charity manage that?

How does anyone manage it? Anyone know?