The cutting of FaceBook and FaceBangs?

I would just like to report that I did not access social media on my phone today! I got on Facebook for exactly ten minutes in a browser on the home computer, which timed me and kicked me out at the right time. 

This is a big deal! There were several times I mindlessly went to the app and almost opened it, to scroll. There were many times I thought of things I wanted to post. It's an emotional challenge for me to not be on Facebook. Part of it is that when I don't have access to it, I feel isolated and like I've lost a friend. Or 800 friends. It's kind of weird. What has happened to my brain? I'm mostly surprised by the emotional response to not having it there for me. 

I have used my time more productively, though. Maybe too productively: I decided to cut my own bangs. Not sure I'll ever do that again. I am definitely a novice, and I'm just hoping I don't look ridiculous!

Self-Compassion

This month I will be working on self-compassion.

The easiest way to explain it is: I will talk to myself the same way I talk to the people I love.

When I first tried to work on this last year, it was really hard. I tried to think of nice things to say to myself, and everything I would try to say would turn into advice or direction-giving. It was really hard! I've had a little bit of practice since then, but am excited to become more consistent and genuine with it this month.

At first I was hesitant to work on this, because it sounded so selfish, and I have issues about selfishness. As I've read the research and thought about it more, I've realized self-compassion is not a selfish thing. It just means we don't treat ourselves like an enemy. It doesn't mean we put ourselves and our needs far above everybody else's and tune out of their lives. It just means that we don't attack ourselves, especially in moments of weakness.

If we consider ourselves to be our own friend, we should talk to ourselves as a friend. If we consider ourselves an enemy, well didn't Jesus Christ say to love our enemies?

Self-compassion does not mean we take more and more time to ourselves. It just means that the time that we do spend with ourselves doesn't involve verbal abuse from within.

As awkward as it might be, this week when I am tempted to insult myself, I will either say "I've got your back, Ali", give myself a hug (seems silly, but has helped in the past!), or find something else encouraging to say. And I will start my commute every day with the song "I Know Heavenly Father Loves Me." =)

Wholehearted Journey

I am intending 2015 to be a very healing year. I know things won't be perfect by the end of the year, but I know things will be better. No matter what the circumstances outside me, my life will be better internally.

I intend to do this through a focus on my Savior, Jesus Christ. I believe that through Him, my sins can be forgiven, my mistakes can be learned from and made beautiful or remedied, and I can be given the strength to grow and change. He sees me as "the glorious being [I am] capable of becoming."

I will be studying and applying His Atonement in my daily and weekly life. I also intend to study and apply the things I've learned from Brene Brown's research. Her research (without God) is not enough, because, as part of her research explains, spirituality is a necessary component. A belief in God and His love is essential in order for healing and resilience to occur.

For me, healing comes through Jesus Christ. And I believe that whether or not people acknowledge it, He is the source of all healing.

I'm going to be trying out each of the Guideposts to Wholehearted Living, one for each month, and living them, to see if these seeds are good. (See Alma 32.) I believe they are, but I will try and see. And I am very excited to see the fruits that I believe will come, as I plant these seeds. =)

Not only do I believe this will help me be happier, I feel that it will help me to bring light to others, and help me to serve people more powerfully, in my profession, my personal ministry, and in my everyday life.



--The guidepost I intend to embrace for the month of January is self-compassion. Which I will write about tomorrow!--

Goals Met and Goals Made - And a Happy Day at Church

And I totally carried through on one of my plans already! My page about 2013 is now completed. See the right sidebar for the link. =D

Church today was fantastic. We talked about balance and some "temporal" things to work on. And we also talked about self-compassion. I felt the Spirit more powerfully and peacefully and cheerfully than I've felt it at church in while. I made some plans to change, and actually most of them have to do with health. Its also my NY Resolution for this month. So I hope I can report some fabulous changes by the end of the month. I hope I can report a consistent new habit of exercising and eating healthy. I started the ball rolling today on a way to change some of my food habits. And I will be going to bed REALLY SOON so I can run on the treadmill at 6:00 tomorrow morning.

Today was my first day playing the organ in the ward here. It went alright. Nowhere near perfect, but I was doing my best. During the middle of the meeting, I was asked to play a surprise intermediate hymn ("You Can Make the Pathway Bright"). I had not practiced it... and it was pretty obvious... but everyone was extremely kind about it and I got complimented by a few people on my willingness to go for it even though I wasn't prepared.

I just felt happier and friendlier today than I have in a while on Sundays. It was a really nice feeling.

In the Wholehearted class, we will be focusing on Resilience. Expect to hear more from me about that.

And without further ado, I will be on my way to bed.

Family selfie! The girl part of the family, anyway. =)